Goodbye
by Hikari no Vikki
Summary: On the night before he leaves forever, Roxas gives Axel one last pleasure. Axel, in his final moments, does not regret that it happened; only that he never had the chance to say good-bye. Rated M for lemon. Written as a giftfic for xXxBloodDeathLovexXx.


Story Title: Goodbye

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Author: Hikari no Vikki

Genre: Romance/Angst

Parings: Axel/Roxas

Disclaimer: I obviously do not own this. So don't bug me.

Description: On the night before he leaves forever, Roxas gives Axel one last pleasure. Axel, in his final moments, does not regret that it happened; only that he never had the chance to say good-bye. Rated M for semi graphic lemon. Written as a giftfic for xXxBloodDeathLovexXx.

**Author's Note:**

I have a dirty, dirty mind… XD

Remember, lemon warning! Yaoi! No like, no read. Flames will be avenged by Axel's fury. :)

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Roxas walked through the wet, dimly lit streets of the World That Never Was. His feet splashed in puddles whether he meant them to or not: as if it mattered. His hood was down, but if the drizzle continued to increase in intensity much longer, he'd had to put it up. His hair was already slicking to his skin.

He had a mission: to take down the Organization once and for all. Nothing could deter him from that mission, because that was what the Organization had drilled into him: that punctuality of a completed mission.

Well, it was certainly going to come back to bite them in the butt now, wasn't it?

But then Roxas saw it: a flash of bright red hair. Green eyes.

He closed his eyes but kept walking. Not now. He wasn't supposed to be here. _Go back home,_ he growled; wishing desperately that the person these features belonged to could actually hear his words. Home. Right. It wasn't his home anymore. Not like it ever had been. They never actually wanted _him_ there: just the keyblade.

"Your mind's made up?" the redhead asked carefully.

Roxas stopped. His eyes flickered open. He didn't turn around. He did, however, turn his head slightly to say, "Why did the Keyblade choose me?" A fitting reply for the redhead's question. There was silence, save for the light drizzle of rain, and then Roxas straightened up again. He didn't give a damn anymore, even about Axel.

When no reply came, he scoffed. "I need to know." He stated plainly, spitting out the words as if they were poison.

There was a flurry of movement behind him; most likely Axel moving from the wall – shocked at the blonde's comment. "You can't turn on the Organization!" Axel cried, trying to sound like a voice of reason, but failing miserably. "You get on their bad side and they'll destroy you!" There was the slightest hint of true panic in his voice now; tiny and faint, but it was there. Roxas turned his head to the right ever so slightly.

"No one would miss me," he shot back, and began walking again.

"That's not true!" Axel shouted, desperate. Roxas stopped again. Axel didn't see him stop, for he looked down at the ground to mutter something that sounded an awful like:

"…I would."

Roxas finally turned around to face Axel. Something within him (his heart?) thudded violently against his chest. Was it the rain and the cold that made him feel this way? "Y-You would?" Axel looked up slowly, trying to regain his normal composure of tacit arrogance, but again failing spectacularly.

"Yes, Rox. I would."

Roxas frowned, staring into the blinding rain. He wished this would make sense; what he was feeling – but, wait! Nobodies can't feel! – and trying to piece of together with what happened to… what was her name? Why was it so hard to remember? Roxas didn't realize he was crying until he tasted salt, not rain, on his lips. He touched his face, fingers trembling.

He felt so cold… and it wasn't from the rain.

He didn't think about moving toward Axel until he was almost upon him, and then finally in the redhead's arms. They stood there a while in a light, drizzling rain, Axel glancing down at him, his expression a conflicted mixture of worry and pity.

"What are these?" Roxas finally asked quietly. Axel was almost startled by the blonde's voice. He blinked. "What?" he asked in return. "What is this water that wells up in my eyes and slides down my cheeks?" Axel smiled bitterly, wiping away a few droplets. "Tears, Roxas. They're tears. They come to you when you're so sad you can't hold it in anymore."

Roxas frowned. "But… we can't feel. So why… am I sad?"

Axel shrugged, still holding Roxas. "Beats me. Are you sure you don't want to head back?" Roxas nodded. "They have to be stopped. You… you don't know what they're doing! It's… it's wrong!"

Axel scoffed quietly. "I do know. I know it all too well. Come back to me, Rox, please." Roxas shook his head. "I'm sorry, Axel. But… maybe you can do something for me?" Axel tilted his head to the side. "Sure, Rox. Just say the word." Roxas moved in closer. He remembered the time Axel had told him about a kiss, and why people kissed. He also knew he needed release, a peace that only Axel could give him, since he was the only one he wanted it from.

So, he kissed the redhead with a wild passion built up from pent up sexual frustration that he'd held in for… well, a very long while.

Axel was stunned. They broke apart, panting as if they'd run a marathon. "Roxas, what–?" Roxas held a finger to his partner's lips. "Please?" Axel, now thoroughly turned on, couldn't control himself. He pushed Roxas against the wall, the pair engrossed in devouring each other's mouths. Axel's hands flew to the zipper of the smaller one's coat, as did his companion. Within minutes, Roxas lay upon the pile of discarded clothing, completely nude, with Axel above him.

His green eyes glittered. _Do you really want this?_ He asked silently, stroking the center of his forehead. Roxas nodded sharply.

_Yes._

Axel moved to ravage him with kisses, nipping at the tender neck flesh and trailing lower to the nipples, teasing them until Roxas mewled in strained pleasure, his manhood twitching.

His hands added to the assault, finally arriving to the spot between the slender, milk white thighs. He grasped Roxas quickly and pumped, Roxas crowing in lustful delight. "Axel… no wait… ngh… I'm gonna…!" It was a quick orgasm, but a fierce first that turned the blonde to putty under the redhead's touch.

Axel was too far gone, having listened to Roxas's cries of pleasure and been subjected to the boy's wandering hands that had worked him into a frenzy. "Rox, don't be afraid…" he whispered huskily, Roxas coming back quickly from the after-haze. He had an idea of what Axel was after, and he wanted it just as much as he knew Axel did.

Axel didn't bother preparing, but entered slowly nonetheless.

The first few moments were filled with excruciating pain, but then it stopped.

"Why…?" Axel looked up into Roxas's eyes. "Move," Roxas growled. He needed him to _move_. Axel obeyed, and any hint of pain from before left him, ecstasy taking over. He moaned, light but throaty, and Axel rolled his head side-to-side, unable to take it much longer.

Thrusts formed as their energy climbed, received by Roxas as his hips bucked up to meet Axel. His nether regions rubbed up against Axel's stomach, creating the friction he desired.

Neither wanted it to end, but they could feel the end coming as quickly as it had started.

Both young men saw stars, electricity crackling between them.

Axel collapsed on top of Roxas, and they stared into each other's eyes, not caring about the light drizzling that was still going on. "Hey Rox… isn't this the part where I say 'I love you'?" Roxas grimaced as Axel pulled out and lay beside him on the discarded clothes. Then he smiled bitterly.

"I suppose… it doesn't entirely hold no meaning… I feel… something for you. I don't know if it's love or not, but… I don't care." He sat up, looking over the other's flawless face, tears running down his face again. "I… remember me. Whenever your end might be. Promise me that." Axel frowned. "Sure… I promise."

Roxas nodded slowly, then dressed himself and walked off into the dark.

Axel wasn't sure what Roxas had meant by that promise. Or what it meant to himself, for that matter.

.oOo.

But he knew now.

He glanced up at the boy who was kneeling in front of him, and for a moment he thought he saw Roxas again, but when he blinked, he saw Sora.

"You're… fading away…" Sora cried softly. Axel smiled bitterly. The image of Roxas reminded him of the night the young blonde had left… and what he'd done. He could almost laugh at the memory, how desperate they'd been to get enough of the other for one, final time.

"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack…" he coughed. "You know what I mean?"

Axel wondered, now, as he drew his last few breaths, why he _actually knew_ he felt… empty. It wasn't quite a feeling… more like the ghost of one. But it was there all the same, and he felt horrible. A tear that Sora couldn't see slid down his face. Ah… now he knew. That night… it didn't matter how wrong it might have been – that it had happened in the first place – in fact, if given the chance, he'd do it again.

He hacked, a dry, wheezing cough, and then lay back down. Then he laughed.

"Not that Nobodies actually HAVE beings… right?"

He turned back to look at Sora.

"Anyway, I digress. Go, find Kairi. Oh, almost forgot… Sorry for what I did to her." To him. He was technically Roxas after all. If only the part of him that could feel.

Sora strained not to make a show of himself. "When we find her, you can tell her that yourself!" He was straining not to stutter, too.

"Think I'll pass," he said, his word beginning to slur a bit, "My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know? Haven't got one." He chuckled, and it almost became a laugh of insanity, but he managed to keep it under wraps. The heart thing… sometimes, especially now, he wondered if he did have something of a heart. He knew, deep down, these were more than just memories of feelings stirring inside. They were real. They had substance.

"Axel?" Sora asked quietly, "What were you trying to do?"

"I wanted to see Roxas," he answered honestly.

He wanted to see him so badly. So badly it hurt. A few tears escaped him, but he was dying anyway. Why should he give a damn about his dignity? "He… was the only one I liked…" he muttered, the words mixing with the air of his failing lungs. "He made me feel… like I had a heart…"

He laughed… and cried.

"It's kind of… funny…" he whispered, "You make me feel…the same…" the words died in the air. He hadn't much time to tell Sora what he needed to know, so he had to tell him now. He forced himself to buck up and push the words past his lips.

"Kairi's in the castle dungeon." He held up and hand, and with what little energy he had left, he opened up a portal. "Now go!"

He feet began to dissolve completely. He could feel it. He wanted to panic, but he forced himself to relax. He had only his thoughts now. He knew why he felt so… empty. So hollow. He'd never gotten to say… goodbye. He glanced at Sora, who still hadn't moved.

"Axel…" the boy sighed sadly.

The rest of Axel began to follow. His legs, his hands… his arms… Just before his top began to dissolve, he choked out a deathly quiet final few words.

"Goodbye Sora. Goodbye… Roxas."

And then he was gone.

Gone, but finally… at peace.

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I really didn't know where to go with this so I just opened up a new document, watched a few AMVs for inspiration, and, well, here it is. Again, if you didn't like the lemon, I warned you. So go away and flame someone with incredibly bad grammar. At least I try, even if I don't catch all my mistakes.

If you liked it though, I would appreciate a review, but they're not required. I wrote this as a giftfic after all.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!


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